Sunday, March 6, 2011

Smart Dating Tips For Women - How To Deal Effectively With Jealousy In Romantic Love Relationships

Love is not a competitive sport. However, many people today sometimes approach it as if it were. A common result of this kind of misguided thinking is the negative fear-based emotion of jealousy.

Jealousy thrives in a competitive environment for gaining attention and feeds some people's starving emotional needs for increased recognition and higher self-esteem. But the major downside is that jealousy triggers unforgettable moments of fear, distrust, and anger which accumulate and inevitably destroy the foundation of loving relationships.

If you recognize the early signs of jealousy, here are several smart things to do in order to prevent it from ruining the relationships that you treasure:

? Gauge how committed you are to the relationship in order to solve this: If you are committed to the relationship and want love to grow, then you possess the necessary ability to find a solution. But if you don't care enough or have the mistaken belief that jealousy is a good thing overall, then your relationship is doomed right from the start.

? Understand the benefits for the person who is jealous: The jealous person begins to learn how to build true self-esteem by recognizing the good in them and eliminating the bad. It teaches them how to focus on love and not on fear.

? Realize the benefits for the person who is triggering the jealousy: The person triggering the jealousy raises their awareness about themselves (unintentional triggers in their language) and learns to communicate their increased level of commitment to the relationship by helping the other person through their jealousy issues.

? Recognize that each person is part of the problem: The jealous person is dealing with a starving human need - self-esteem and the question of "Am I good enough?" On the other hand, the person who is the object of the jealousy is either: 1) Unaware of how they are triggering the jealousy, 2) Doesn't care enough about causing it, or 3) Feels there is a benefit to making the other person jealous (their own issues of low self-esteem or the unenlightened mindset of manipulative strategies for love that are commonly practiced today).

? Know how each person is responsible for the solution: The jealous person begins to build their self-esteem by realizing the good qualities within themselves and eliminating those that no longer serve them well. They recognize that the problem is within themselves and not outside. Conversely, the person triggering the jealousy raises their awareness and learns to communicate their increased level of commitment to the relationship by helping the other person to emotional well-being.

When you put all of your energy and focus into healing the jealous person and communicating love and joy to each other on a consistent basis, you will naturally solve your jealousy issues for good.


Jealousy is fear in disguise. When you recognize the causes of jealousy, you'll be on your way to removing it from your relationships. By communicating love, respect, and joy consistently, creatively, and spontaneously, you'll be taking the enlightened approach to gaining and holding the right kind of healthy attention in a loving relationship.

Steve Nakamoto - "The Voice Of The Other Half"'s Ask Mr. Answer Man Relationship Expert
2-Time Writer's Digest Award-Winning Author
Author of Men Are Like Fish: What Every Woman Needs To Know About Catching A Man - Talk Like A Winner! 21 Simple Rules For Everyday Communication Success - Dating Rocks! The 21 Smartest Moves Women Make For Love


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